I am the feminine, if not femme, partner in a lesbian marriage. Earlier this year, my wife’s younger brother died.  A month later,  she decided we were moving down South to be closer to her family Before It Was Too Late.  I landed in her parent’s basement last month and got married 18 days ago. Today is August 18, 2009. My goals for the first year of marriage are to pay down credit card debt and get pregnant. When it comes to the “heavy lifting” of pregnancy, as an acquaintance so aptly put it, I will be doing it.

Currently,  I am unpregnant and 7,088 dollars in credit card debt, not counting my father’s funeral bill. I am 32, she is 30 – Libra/Gemini. We are a social worker and special education teacher, respectively. I work with families who are trying to figure out how to parent special needs children who are at risk of  being removed to foster care, detained in detention, or admitted to a psychiatric hospital. I think they call it family preservation. She works in a middle school. 5th grade.

UPDATE January 2010: Basement aborted. Our two bedroom one bath was born on January 4th. (Credit cards be damned.)

UPDATE May 2010: I want to move to Baltimore

UPDATE SEPT 2010: We moved to Asheville


9 Responses to “The Basics”

  1. Rachel said

    I just wanted to say how much I have enjoyed both of your blogs. I came across both through completely different avenues and was so excited when I made the connection. Even on your down days, your entries are touching, inspirational, and hysterical in all the right proportions. I wish you luck with your baby-making; a child couldn’t ask for better than having two parents who worked so hard to bring them into this world.

  2. Eva said

    Your blog seems great. Can’t wait to read more. Good luck with everything. And I’m glad you decided to leave the basement. 😉

  3. Wow! I don’t know how you came across me but a) thanks for adding me to your blogroll, and b) we have an unbelievable amount in common! I, femme lesbian, grew up Quaker (my mother is a Quaker minister/semi-retired but every time I talk to her she’s writing another sermon) and am now Congregationalist. I am moving back to my homeland of the South this summer to be not only closer to my parents again but to live within a few miles of the love of my life, the woman I came out with 26 years ago in college (we just reunited late last summer and decided to give it a go for good in December). Finally, I have a 9-year-old son that I conceived through donor insemination. It would depress you if I told you how long it took but I was older and had some health issues like severe endometriosis. Anyway, I’d love to chat with you more and hear more of your story and I look forward to reading your blog on a regular basis.

  4. Debbie said

    This is a fantastic blog.

  5. Lindsay said

    I’m not sure how you came across my blog, but I appreciate your words…and I love your blog, too! Here’s to being fans of each other. Hip hip…

  6. fishina said

    New to the world of blogs and TTC but not the world of social work. I can tell I’m going to be hooked on your blog!

  7. just stumbled across your blog and will be following you now 🙂 GOOD LUCK with TTC

  8. I have browsed a good amount of blogs lately. And i have even started one of my own. I came across yours today and I have to admit that I love it. Its very lovely and I look forward to reading more.

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