One Step Ahead

April 8, 2010

The sperms for try #4 were received by Wifebian this morning. They were not delivered to the wrong location and the gay sperm man didnt forget to give us the combination to the tank. These must be signs.

Except that Operation Pregnancy has turned into “outpatient-surgery-with-local anesthetic” pregnancy. No water, no evening primrose, no temping, lots of milk, coffee and a few alcoholic drinks for good measure. This is consistent with my general nature — erratic, unpredictable bursts of effort saturated with resentment and ambivalence. It’s just that last month every cup of coffee felt like an abortion and that made me angry, so whatev. If this baby can’t handle a few cups of coffee, it has no business being in my house.

That being said, I have an appointment on the 23rd at some fertility spot. We are considering a hail-mary IUI in May — the month the money runs out. Getting an IUI would require a sonogram, some bloodwork and a test of my fallopian tubes to confirm that they are clear, AKA an HSG. According to a phone conversation I had with an insurance rep when they were refusing to pay for something else entirely, the company pays for diagnostics related to infertility if there are “signs and sympotoms” of infertility, but not treatments. Of course, I dont know what Anthem considers to be a” sign” or “symptom” of infertility. When I called them, they would only tell me that it depends on what the doctor says. So, I don’t know if there are any lesbian clauses in there when it comes to “signs and symptoms”. For example,  “We dont need to pay for a sonogram to tell you that fucking a chick isnt going to make a baby.” But I’m not gonna lie about the chick thing so, whatevs.

Finally, an IUI in May would require a change of donor. There are only two donors at the gay sperm shop who are IUI ready and ours isnt one of them. Can you make non-IUI sperm be IUI? If not, of the two who are, the one who has knocked up some ladies describes himself as a “scientist for the government”. Another way of putting that might be, “Using my sperm puts your offspring at high risk of autism spectrum difficulties affecting every realm of intrapsychic, interpersonal, vocational and social life. He is also educated, employed, landed, bisexual, tall, brown-haired, blue-eyed, non-smoking, non-drinking and from NYC. So, we will trade autism risk for smarts, gayness, health, good coloring and some regional flair. You have to remember that using sperm from this shop means that we will actually end up knowing the donor in some way. I wouldnt mind adding a New Yorker to my repertoire.

So let’s email the sperm shop and find out our new donor’s sperm stats, shall we?


4 Responses to “One Step Ahead”

  1. A few words of advice from this insurance-fighting veteran….

    According to most of the Access of Evil (i.e., insurance companies) “signs and symptoms” of IF are: trying for more than 12 months without success if you are under 35, or six months if you are over 35. IF there is anyway you can get this into your doctor notes, now is the time to do this– say you were trying with a KD, or whatever you want to say, for long enough to get you that dx, because all those tests are going to be expensive.

    And IMO yeah, you should lie about the girl thing because it won’t do anything to raise their consciousness by telling the truth and it may get you kicked out of consideration for any IF coverage. The key is your dr.’s notes. I know this all too well. If you can get a note in their that gives you a reasonable claim of having tried with sperm for 6-12 months OR some other indication of IF (like a dx of probably endometriosis, irregular periods, etc.) do it. By any means necessary!

  2. lots to think about, from the sound of it. a little help:

    – an RE’s office should have no trouble making ICI sperm IUI-ready — they do it all the time for the hets, after all, as nobody ejaculates IUI-ready sperm. we did find that when we had the office wash ICI sperm for our IUIs (in an attempt to buy the cheaper stuff from the bank, since my insurance will pay for the doc to wash it), the counts were low enough that we had to use two ICI vials to get counts our doc was happy with for IUI. (so we bought IUI vials thereafter. for an IVF cycle, the lab has recommended we buy ICI sperm for them to wash — two vials, but one is back-up.)

    – Dr. Baby Factory had no problem coding me as infertile from the get-go, as “as far as I’m concerned, you’re unable to get pregnant without my help.” i hope you find a similar situation. (FWIW, i have had no trouble, but i am aware that my insurance situation is unusually good.)

    if not, you might be able to take the tack that a huge number of women have endometriosis, which can cause scarring and blockage of the fallopian tubes. severity of endo is not well-correlated to pain, so theoretically, you could have it without being aware of any symptoms. (though i hope you don’t.) maybe you could sell the insurance on the HSG as a test to see if you have endo-related scarring? just an idea.

  3. mrsbasement said

    1.) Anthem. I have BCBS Anthem. Any insurance-specific thoughts?

    2.) Is HSG not routine? I figured that an HSG would just be a run-of-the-mill diagnostic, or is it just for people who might have endometriosis?

    3.) But can they make *frozen* ICI ready for IUI?

    4.) If Anthem wont pay for diagnostics because I’m having sex with a lesbian, then I’ll just do the IUI without the tests, fail to get pregnant,flee to the mid atlantic and do my best to convince this gay male couple of ours to give us all of their sperm now — in exchange for a baby for them later. Wouldnt THAT make a great blog?

  4. Sarah said

    Hi love. You’ve got much better comments above from more informed people, but for my two cents:

    Every insurance plan is different by state. For example, I got the infertile label the second month in at the RE which in my state means that BCBS WON’T pay for anything again – diagnostic or otherwise. They paid for one ultrasound and meds up until I got the IF label and then paid for nothing. Idaho hates. Talk with your doc about their experience with your insurance and hopefully you can get in on what they know. It really is all about the doc’s notes and their billing codes.

    If they’ll pay for an HSG, it may be worth doing. However, I would be hesitant to do it on your hail mary cycle if you aren’t going to do another cycle right after because your chances go up the first two cycles after an HSG. Makes your tubes all open and clean or whatever.

    If your clinic can make ICI ready for IUI, they’ll just thaw the ICI first and then prep it. No biggy.

    Good luck hun. And drink that coffee. What works for every person is different, but the moment I stopped all the bother and worry (ie coffee abortions) and timed it better, it worked. I had to get out of my own way. Sounds like you’re doing a great job.

    I feel good about this try. Hope you do too. xoxo

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