October 11, 2009

Wifebian and I visited storied Asheville, NC yesterday. Blue Ridge Pride was the excuse, but the future was the reason. Basically, we need to find a liberal, affordable place on the East Coast to build and maybe even feather our nest. We need liberal because we are queer, affordable because we are a teacher and a social worker, respectively, and on the East Coast because we have needy, demanding families, I mean, families that need and demand us, I mean, families that care. I mean families.

Blueridge Pride was sweet. No leathermen, no muscled gay men, no dykes on bikes, no bears, no high femmes, maybe two teens of color. Definitely a lot of 28 year-old white lesbians in knit hats and a refreshing assortment of white transwomen aging very gracefully. And some jugglers. And some acrobats. And a parade led by participants around the baseball field upon which the booths were set up. Sweet, but wet.

Asheville itself was bigger than I expected and busier. Richer and more urban. At the same time, if I played my cards right, I could live a 12 hour day without seeing one national chain. Asheville is totally liveable and totally affordable. But it doesnt speak to me deeply.  Maybe it’s because I have no sense of connection to some random mountain town in North Carolina no matter how cool it is. I need that connection to place. In Asheville, there are no friends, family, or sense of culture, like I would have with San Fran or Washington DC. I also wouldnt be buying a house in either of those places either, which makes me wonder why all the brouhaha  about buying houses anyway . . .

Then there are the logistics of getting pregnant. Who in their right mind gets pregnant and promptly moves hours away from the closest free meal, simultaneously necessitating the landing of two new jobs? Because I refuse to be 9 months pregnant in this house. Plus, when we do move from here we are in a perfect position to buy, what with no lease. (For just once in my little social worker life, I want to turn one circumstance into some spectacularly smart financial decision. Omg, not to mention that first time home buyer credit that might get extended.)

But I am getting ahead of myself. It’s Sunday morning. All I really have to do is get off the computer and snuggle my wife.

And get some coffee.

More and more, the principles of NA and AA speak to me, as they are indeed the principles of my childhood. Some people get ethnic food, some people get a mama loshn. I have bumper sticker slogans.

One day at a time.


2 Responses to “Asheville”

  1. thebao said

    Asheville is gorgeous. I’m from the Blue Ridge Mountains (in VA) originally and there is something about mountains that does speak to me. I think it’s all about what feels like home. I can’t see myself ever living in Asheville or my hometown permanently, though–it doesn’t make sense for my career or relationship. But how wonderful to hear that Asheville’s pride was a good time.

  2. […] 21, 2010 Wifebian and I are talking about Asheville, again. Out of the blue, she had a blind panic about Baltimore because she basically hates […]

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