Vivid Ache

September 30, 2009

My mood lifted today when I went out to a client’s house with a coworker. For some reason, we were assigned to work with a family together even though we are not on the same team.

She told a pretty good story about going out on a CPS call, only to find that she was investigating some great, big, grand poobah in the KKK. She said his robes were hanging up in the living room.This would not happen where I’m from.

Then we went to lunch at Panera and she told me about her life from the Indigo Girls concert to her bipolar suicidal ex-wife. I always ask her a lot of questions and she never asks me any, in a way that I find totally not irritating at all. She is 43 and gay and a mother of twins. She has this seriousness and sweetness about her.  She wears scrunchies and drives stick. She cares about your right to self determination, even if you are a 19 year old parent of a toddler who has determined that you would rather sleep in a tent in your sister’s backyard than stay in a shelter. In the social work game, she is upbeat and proactive – a fantastic influence on me.

At any rate, after we called and knocked and left a note to no avail, I came back to the office to finish a treatment plan and submit billing. This morning, I bought a bow for my billing because for the past three weeks it has been late, but not this week, no sirree. On time. With a pastel bow stapled in the top left hand corner.

In uterus news, yesterday, the flexible spending account credit card came in the mail without warning. Now, we don’t have to save money to buy sperm, we can just swipe the FSA credit card. It is cycle day 15, my temperatures are making no sense and the OPKs are negative, but I remembered to take the prenatal vitamin. Tonight I watched the show “I Didn’t Know I Was Pregnant!” with my pregnant middle SIL. We were fascinated and sympathetic. When I asked how being a mother has changed her, my coworker says she feels a “vivid ache” when she thinks about the fact that one day she will die. At nine weeks, middle SIL is 35% sure she will not miscarry again. I’m the one that asked for percentages.

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One Response to “Vivid Ache”

  1. Loaf said

    I’m really liking reading this blog and finding out more about your life. Good luck with the baby-making!

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